Jai Alai - Cigar City, Flordia

That good good, the flagship from one of Florida's top boys. I first came across Cigar City by chance, they did a collab with my all time favorites Magic Rock back in 2016. Wayniac was an absolute belter and this beer is no different from the Floridian's



Cigar City Brewing Jai Alai IPA
ABV - 7.5%

Colour - Copper to misty gold with a decent opacity. Minimal head that disperses in no time at all.
Smell - Soft on the nose with vague tropical notes and a citrus after burn. Potentially some grassy odours reminiscent of a golf course in July. Hops are far from overpowering for an IPA and there's a subtle sweetness that carries through to the flavour.
Taste - A real taste sensation, there's no wonder this is their top boy it's real tasty. The sweetness from the smell carries through with vague hints of caramel and an almost piney after taste.

4/5 - A real sup'able number! So good in-fact I'm going to swing by their tap room later this week. Sweeter than your average IPA and one that even no crafty folks can enjoy.

Cumbres Maíz Morado

This was my post Machu Picchu beer and it was certainly one to remember. These guys put corn in everything and their craft beer is no different.

Brewed by: Cervecería Gourmet, Peru

Style: American IPA

(ABV): 7.20%

Colour - Deep orange. Much darker than I expected for an IPA Could be closer to a DIPA on first glance. Maybe it's the maiz. The head is a solid consistent white.

Smell - Musty grapefruit hop. Medicinal sweet corn aroma, but not as intense as the Cumbres Roja.

Taste - They don't half make strange tasting beer over here. Sweet and corny straight up. Strong piney hops cut through the initial sweetness. Not one for the faint hearted as the hops make a reappearance as you finish.

Feel - Fairly heavy on the mouth with medium carbonation.

2/5 Not my vibe

Graçias Seńor Jesus

Ladies, Gentlemen and any of the other 62 genders you can officially identify yourself as Buenos Dias, Mucho Gustó.

As seems to be the running theme with this blog, we've had something of a break between posts. South America has so very much to offer it's been hard to peel myself away and deliver some hard hitting, informative yet entertaining content. Thankfully today is your lucky day!

To give you an idea as to how much has gone on in the last 28 days I will now list all the places I've visited with a handy map at the bottom for those that don't like to read.

Santiago - Chile
Valparaiso - Chile
Mendoza - Argentina
Santiago - Chile
Sao Paulo - Brazil
Río de Janeiro - Brazil
Ilha Grande - Brazil
Paraty - Brazil
Sao Paulo - Brazil
Florianópolis - Brazil
Foz de Iguacu - Brazil
Puerto Iguazú - Argentina
Tucumán - Argentina
Salta - Argentina
Cafayate - Argentina
Purmamarca - Argentina
San Pedro de Atacama - Chile
Uyuni - Bolivia
Potosí - Bolivia

So, as you can see theres been some ground covered. The vast majority of travel has been on buses which sounds terrible and at some points it has been a real war of attrition. Thankfully the quality of buses thus far has been pretty decent. A word to the wise for anybody travelling South America, if you get the opportunity to pick your seats on a bus, go downstairs on the double deckers, it's worth the extra money. Rather than being fed crackers, Dolce du leche and horrific coffee you actually get real food and wine! *Not every journey*

Having put in several 11+ hour stints on these buses it's worth me passing on these little nuggets of wisdom; bring your own toilet roll, bring snacks, bring a book, bring a bloody jacket/blanket and lastly, try and get the bus when you're tired! On the whole most buses have been really good specifically Brazil and Chile. Properly comfortable chairs, WiFi, A/C, USB charging ports and even movies. Sadly as progress north continues into the less developed countries the quality has dropped. I'm currently travelling on a bus in Bolivia where I barely fit in the chair.

That's the first and last time I'm going to write about buses, but think about me throughout the next 4 months, squashed into tiny chairs for small people whilst you lounge in normal people sized transport. Saying that, if you're on the the Harrogate to Leeds train, I don't miss that cattle truck one bit.

So, travelling and stuff, yeah...

After a 12 hour flight from Auckland to Santiago and a 17°c temperature jump it really felt like I was in South America. However the jet lag was heavy! A 13 hour time difference and 31°c everyday made it a real nightmare to get my shit together. Well, that and I met some awesome people and went out every night for the first 3 days. Santiago wasn't a huge culture shock and to be honest it took until Salta to real feel anything like what you would imagine. Chile, Argentina and Brazil were so well developed in the areas I visited initially I could have been anywhere in the world.

Rather than go through exactly what I've done in each place  I've compiled a highlight reel, complete with photos and anecdotes.

Chile - Photos
As you may have seen on Facebook, Latin America is blessed with awesome street art/graffiti. Here's an album documenting my favourites so far.

Valapariso, had by far the most varied and visually enjoyable street art, not to mention being a really cool city!

Santiago - I was lucky enough to meet some really cool Chilean people (not to mention the legends in my hostel) who took me under their wing. Roof top birthday BBQ's, nightclubs playing banging techno until 8am and of course delicious craft beer. I also had an unreal sandwich at Funete Alemena

San Pedro de Atacama - The start of our desert adventure. On first glance, it doesn't seem like there's much going on in San Pedro. When I sent a photo to Jonny Amaku he calmly asked if I had gone to Afghanistan!

Sat in the desert near the Chilean, Bolivian and Argentinian borders this town is where all the good tours and adventures start. Surrounded by volcano's and the Andes mountain range San Ped is picturesque. Without a doubt the most comfortable bed I've slept in since leaving England was in SP and I have to thank Kezia for picking Hostel Ayni, that and she's generally been okay company thus far.

Desert Valley bike rides, abandoned pre-colonial forts, fording fast flowing rivers on said push bikes, stunning landscapes in Valle de Luna, delicious pizza, feathered Charizard hats *see pics* and potentially radioactive Fanta made SP a great place.

Argentina - Photos

Mendoza - Wine, steak, great Aussies, beautiful tree lined streets this place is the tits.

Salta - The first time I actually felt like I was in South America! Not much to do in the city but a great place to do day trips from. The painted hills, Cafayate and Purmamarca are places of real natural beauty. You may be wondering about the title of this blog post now. Well, whilst in Salta I came across the best bumper sticker ever, but didn't have my phone to snap a shot. It was essentially a motivational quote/meme with the words "Gracias Señor Jesús" which really tickled me!

Puerto Igazu - I don't care what anybody says, the Argentinian side of Igauzu falls is much better than the Brazilian one, I've done both and can confirm!

Brazil - Photos

Sao Paulo - Nick Pawley and Dri are saints and I can't thank them enough for their hospitality. Sao Paulo for most people can be a scary and dangerous city. Knowing people on the inside makes a big difference. The food here is incredible and Sao Paulo is a very cool city, despite being absolutely massive.

Ilha Grande - There are no words to describe this island paradise off the coast Brazil. What used to be the Brazilian answer to Alkatraz is now a lovely little holiday destination. Beautiful beaches galore and spectacular lagoons make for plenty of day trips. Being intrepid explorers meant exploring the abandoned prison and finding a nearly empty beach was necessary. On the walk back we acquired a wonderful street dog who guided us through the dense forest all the way to the other side of the album, here's to you señor doge.

Bolivia - Photos

I've just got here but let me tell you trip from San Pedro to Uyuni Is worth the money. The landscapes and wildlife you will see are immense. There was even a hotel made out of salt! Obviously I had to lick the wall to check it wasn't a scam.

Potosí - A really cool city with more fried chicken and mobile phone shops than I can shake a stick at. More updates to come ...

Well there you go, 28 days of travelling compacted into one magical blog post.

If you've made it this far well done and thank you.

Until next time...

Map

NZ it's been a pleasure

So I may have been wrong with the sign off on my last post. Lake Mahinapua was not my final stop before Queenstown. To be honest it was quite a rushed few days. Plus I'm writing this a month after it happened because I've been slacking when it comes to sharing my tales.

Lake Mahinapua was responsible one of my worst hangovers of all time. Thankfully there is a mean breakfast of all you can eat bacon and pancakes. As we all know, nothing curse a hangover like bacon and carbs. The journey to Franz Josef was painful to say the least. However upon our arrival the gods decided to provide mercy with an all you can eat pizza buffet in the evening. Now I'm not a man known for his religious beliefs but two all you can eat affairs in the same day is nothing short of a divine miracle. A special mention goes to the big man Karl for consuming 20(maybe 21) pieces of pizza, I only did 18 as I wanted to actually enjoy my evening 🙄

What can we tell you about the big man Franz? Well he's a glacier, but not just any glacier, the only​ (if I remember correctly) glacier in a rainforest. Now you can't tell me that's not cool? It is also one of the best places in the world to skydive. The wonderful Dayna, my Canadian partner in crime for the duration of NZ partook and I can confirm on her behalf it is fucking awesome! Sadly my pockets weren't deep enough to facilitate a skydive so we gathered a crew to hike up to Franz himself. There was a moment when we were hiking that I noticed I only seemed to be travelling with only girls. A special shout out goes to the following ladies; Dayna, Holly, Katy and Rosie.

The walk through the valley was excellent, the sheer size of the glacier and the surrounding​ area is awe inspiring. This felt more like Lord of The Rings than Mt Doom. One thing I must say is that if you're going to visit, it might be better in winter as you can't really get close enough to the glacier itself.

There is now a very important thing to mention. I met an absolute legend called Ania who pointed out that Fox Glacier has no foxes, naturally I went to check. I can confirm there are no foxes and urge NZ govt to look into this case of false advertising.

Next on the hit list is one of my favourite places in not just NZ but the whole world thus far. Burritos, Mountains, Skiing (in season), a tree in the middle of a lake, delicious ice cream and another bloody glacier! It's Wanaka baby! That's right we managed to see 3 glaciers, climb 3 mountains and eat 3 of the best burritos in a very short time in Wanaka. It has got a very chilled vibe with a huge lake and surrounded by mountains. Without a doubt one of the most beautiful town's I have ever been to. You arrive and immediately feel happy, or at least I did. In and around Wanaka there's lots of me talk about a man called Roy. Who Is Roy? Why is he so popular? What's he ever done for me? There's Roy's Peak and Rob Roy's Glacier, two of the more prominent attractions bearing his name.

Going on a trip like this is about trying new things. So with this in mind I lost my hammock virginity, boy that was special! But it wasn't just about hammocks. For the very first time I hitchhiked. If you've been to NZ you may already know that literally everybody travelling hitch hikes. The noble Kiwi and even foreigners are happy to hand out a lift to people popping a thumb. This provides us with transport to many of our hikes as they're always just a little too far out of town. Guess who found out who Roy was as well!?!! I'm sure you can guess, it was me and Dayna. Whilst hitch hiking to Rob Roy's glacier we asked a very knowledgeable and cool Kiwi guy, "What's up with all the stuff named after Roy?" It turns out he was an explorer and general legend in the area who climbed most of the local mountains before anybody else.

Before we move on to Queenstown, I need to talk to you about Burritos in Wanaka. There is no better burrito in NZ, maybe even the southern hemisphere than Burrito Craft and their Pulled Pork number. Also the new hot sauce, Trinidaddy Longlegs was lit!

Queenstown. What can I say about Queenstown? It's a very special place, that my h is for sure. In my head it had been built up to be this huge city of gluttonous debauchery and extreme sports. It turns out the debaucherous side is true, as is the extreme sports. However it's really quite a small place, but boy is it beautiful. I can't tell you how magical in words so there are photos to attempt to do the majesty of this fair town justice. Like Wanaka, QT is surrounded by mountains and perched on beautiful lake. Whilst Wanka is the place you would want to live, QT is the place to party, it is a magnetism and the energy is palpable on arrival.

Burgers, Beers, Babes, Bondage and Backgammon. Well, I witnessed all apart from the last two which I understand are available in QT. Whilst I didn't partake in any debaucherous acts whilst playing Backgammon I did use QT as a base for travelling to see the "8th Natural Wonder of the World" and also to climb one of New Zealand's best peaks. Ben Lomond is a great hike and in my opinion the best peak in NZ. You've got Mount Aspiring National Park on one side, The Remarkable's (A quite remarkable mountain range) and the beautiful Lake Wakatipu. Truly and awe inspiring spectacle, which I was struggling to conquer if it wasn't for my able bodied companion's whom I'd been drinking to excess with the night before. A special thanks to Kezia and Karl for making sure I didn't bottle it half way and conquered that big ol' mountain.

You're now probably wondering what is the 8th Natural Wonder in the world? Well as you may already by aware the Kiwi's are a fiercely proud nation. So if they think they've got something good, they will let you know. Milford Sound is really spectacular. Small caveat however, it's not actually a sound. It is in fact a fiord! I could explain the difference or I could direct you to this handy link. The drive to Milford alone is spectacular, you go through what is fondly known as the valley of a thousand waterfalls and it's really really awesome. I even had one of those "Wow I'm really here doing this" moments that you get travelling and it was really excellent. The weather is a big deciding factor when booking Milford. It nearly always rains there and we were super fortunate to get the best day in ages! However with some rain the valley of a thousand waterfalls would be even better.

The one problem with Queenstown is the number of great food establishments to relieve you of your hard earned cash. Fergburger, Fergburger, CookieTime, Devil Buger, Taco Medic and I even had a KFC simply because they had a double burger. All were incredible to eat and I could see myself gaining many kilo's eating all that shit erry'day!

The end of my NZ affair is coming thick and fast with a quick stop in Christchurch before back to Auckland and away to South America. Christchurch is a city with heaps of potential but after the terrible earthquake they suffered it's still a work in progress with many severely damaged buildings still. Thankfully when you've got an old mate from Harrogate there he can keep you on the right path and show you the ropes. Jamie Grant is a legend in his own lifetime and if you don't know him you should get to. We spent a day mooching around the city drinking beer and looking at what Christchurch used to have and what it will have in the future. I also managed to squeeze in a music festival called Electric Avenue. Saw some good people, saw some not so good people but had a banging day nevertheless. David Dallas is the best rapper New Zealand has FYI.

Before I left though, there was one thing on my NZ bucket list to be ticked off. A bloody rugby game! I got to see the mighty Chief's of Waikato destroy the Blue's, their bitter rivals. I even got to witness a Waikato legend in action, the infamous Possum. A Chief's fan who used to rev a chainsaw whilst atop a cherry picker every time the Chief's scored a try. Sadly he's been relegated to the stand's now but is by no means quiet.

I love New Zealand a lot. It's so much like home but just a touch better in most areas.

It's been a pleasure New Zealand, see you soon.

Best of NZ Photos

Well into Welly

Classic lazy Gordo, didn't bother writing my blog for over a month. Now I'm left with a list of excellent quotes and memories littered with typo's because, the best memories are usually made half cut!

So I left you as I was just leaving The River Valley Lodge in Taihape. As the name suggests, it's by a river, in a valley, no surprises there then. River Valley is good and properly off the grid, no internet, no phone signal and just a bar filled with rowdy individuals such as myself to entertain us all. River Valley are known for their table challenge. Essentially you have to take your shirt off (obviously) and circumnavigate a large wooden table in the middle of the bar whilst everybody cheers you on. The first to achieve this feat was not myself, nor was I the last. A heated game of beer pong and the ping-pong using a netball were much more interesting, and achievable. 

After waking with a monster hangover it was time to embark on my first whitewater rafting trip. There is nothing like cold water and extreme sports to get rid of a hangover. Without a shadow of a doubt whitewater rafting is one of the best things I have ever done! We had a great boat and an even better guide. One younger gent on the boat was particularly jaded from the previous evenings festivities. It wasn't until after the ride I was made aware that this guy had chosen to relieve the contents of his bladder on the top bunk of a giant 16 person dorm bed, soaking the unlucky chap below and his neighbours. However this wasn't simply a case of not making it to the toilet. He actually stood up, pulled his trousers down and peed against the wall as he couldn't be bothered to head to the bathroom. Also a 32 year old women drank 3 bottles of wine and threw up all over herself, what fun!

After our rafting excursion it was over to the capital, windy Wellington! The first of 2 big surprises came when I bumped into somebody from my quaint home town of Harrogate living in the hostel I had chosen! What a shock to the system it was. I had literally no idea she was even in NZ never mind at the hostel, Hi Flick if you're reading this. The second shock was that I had managed to lightly sprain my ankle when I fell out of the boat the previous day. As anybody who has rafted before will know, you stick a foot in the boat under the seat to secure yourself. Sadly the secured foot was very secure indeed. When I was upended from the boat that leg remained attached to boat. Not ideal but hey, its not supposed to be safe. 

So with a lightly sprained ankle, we took to the streets of Wellington. Following a brief trip through the food market and up the infamous Cuba street our team happened upon to excellent discoveries in quick succession. Ekim Burger truck and Laundry Bar. You can guess why the burger van was good but, the real crown jewel was seeing that a Mungos High-Fi an artist I have seen countless times at raves all over the world was playing that very night!!!!! Damaged ankle in tow I skanked out like a yardie until the earlier hours, here's my fave Mungo's track.

Wellington is the city I had been searching for in NZ. Not too warm (it's too windy), lots of craft beer including in my opinion NZ's top breweries, decent mountains to climb, great food and a nice small city center. If I was going to move to NZ, Welly would certainly be very close to number one if not my top choice. As you can imagine, delicious beer, cool rooftop bars, cocktails and delicious food were consumed to great extent. I also learnt some exciting new Italian swear words which I will relay to you in person should you ask.

Despite what I told myself, I didn't hit up the wineries in Marlborough nor did I get over to Abel Tasman national park in the South Island. These are must does and I can only apologise to myself and you, the adoring public. What I did get to do was visit the beautiful Kaiteriteri which has some truly spectacular views and clear skies perfect for sky gazing. Afterwards we headed down to the famous Lake Rotoiti to take a classic traveller photo. Sadly the weather wasn't ideal so we didn't get the full glory of the valley. However I still jumped in the water where there are loads of eels *check the photos*. On this leg of the journey we paid a visit to Cape Foulwind. The Cape was so named by Cpt Cook with good reason, it blows a f**king gale there. Our visit was no exception, but not did it make for some moody photo's. I also got to see Seel's which made me very happy indeed.  

The final stop before Queenstown was in the middle of nowhere at Lake Mahinapua. A pub without much to offer except free breakfast of bacon and pancakes, 2 hot tubs and a delicious beer named after their late great owner; Les. Tradition dictates a fancy dress party and my first encounter with the "Anything but clothes" theme. It's fairly self explanatory theme so we can leave it there. All you need to know is a good friend called Karl won but making a costume to look like he was being eaten by a shark. Truly an inspiration to us all.

On that bomb shell it's time to end. Next on the agenda is what went down in Queenstown and beyond.

Photos here

Peace 

Couple Sours - NZ

If there's two things I'm a sucker for in this world it's sour beer and excellent can art. Today I present you with both.

But it's not one beer oh no! Two for the price of one just like that guy who sells windows says "You buy one you get one free". These weren't actually buy one get one because that doesn't seem to be a thing in craft beer but anyway, on with the review.

Jungle Boogie - Funk Estate, Auckland, NZ

Blood Orange Sour

ABV 5.3%

Colour: Initial pour is golden, settling with peachy tones and a frothy white head that disperses fairly quickly

Smell: Super fruity! The orange is prominent with lighter citrus notes falling into the background

Taste: The sour notes are at the forefront of your mouth but not overpowering. Grapefuit and subtle sweetness rounding of the taste nicely into a very drinkable sour.

Feel: Thin in the mouth with a faint fizz, sourness lingers just a tab.

3/5

Dr Funk - Funk Estate, Auckland, NZ

Brewers notes - Welcome to the stage Dr Funk as he drops his latest eclectic new beat; combining samples of Japanese and Persian citrus from his two decks afront of a psychedelic backdrop of flavours. Dr Funk is the trippy lovechild of Funk Estate and Doctor’s Orders Brewing. Frankenstein; no. Groovy yuzu, black lime tart and addictive nectar; yes. Enjoy.

Sour Ale

ABV - 4.9%

Colour:  Pours a crystal gold/yellow, with a minute white head.

Smell: The dominant smell is citrus, a hint of hay (barn yard brawl) with light malts throughout.

Taste: Delictable first sip with a dry after note. Reminiscent of a good white wine? The sourness isn’t overbearing. Lots of lemon and what almost feels like mango

Feel: A couple of steps away from a berliner weiss. Light and bubbly in the mouth with moderate fizz

Founders Breakfast Stout - In Full

Founders Breakfast Stout

My experiences with Founders have been fairly limited, All Day IPA was a staple 2 summers ago when I first got into craft beer. One thing I've always had time for is a coffee stout and this oatmeal/coffee/chocolate breakfast number seems to fit the bill on face value.

With a persistent milk chocolate head this is truly a stout by nature. It’s as black as tar with a thick yet buoyant consistency. 

Despite it being a double chocolate stout the first impressions are a heavy coffee aroma with an after thought of dark rich chocolate. The flavours feel balanced yet the coffee overrides the chocolate and I feel the oatmeal contributes nothing but thickness.

A bittersweet combination first impressions are bitter with an after thought of a complex dark chocolate notes. Initially heavy in the mouth it goes down well with a small amount of fizz as it goes down.

Overall I enjoyed the beer but feel like the chocolate could’ve been a little more prominent. A coffee stout will always have a place in my heart but this certainly isn’t the best I’ve ever had.

3/5

Kiwi Experience / Birthday Vibes

Jordan's Kiwi oddessy continues here and now with our latest installment available today for your eyeballs.

So, last time I gave you a long old list of the cool shit I've been doing. Today won't quite the same. But rest assured, I've been fucking shit up like Donald Trump (only with respect for women, climate change and minorities). We left off last time at The Fat Freddy's gig in The Villa Maria Winery. Fat Freddy's really seem to be at their peak still after all these years, it's really amazing to see a band who've been around for over 9 years killing it so well. I would pay the same money and more to watch it all again. This will come as something of a shock for some of you, but Villa Maria very nearly ran out of wine at the event!

From today's title you may be wondering what is Kiwi Experience? Essentially they've got loads of buses that drive around NZ taking foreigners such as yours truly to various cultural and exciting points of interest throughout the country. As you can imagine 40 plus rowdy European's, Canadians and Americans running all over NZ on a bus together guarantees fun times and high jinx are not in short supply.

Since first coming to NZ in December I have developed something of a passion for kayaking. Our first first stop on the Kiwi Experience trip was up to Hot Water Beach near Thames, an area I am very familiar with as it's where Chris' parents live. The preliminary Kiwi ex activity was a kayak trip though a marine nature reserve to Cathedral Cove, a very popular beach with suitably impressive rock formations. After the excursion we watched the sun set at Hot Water Beach. Why is it called hot water beach? Three guesses.... At low tide there are geothermal pools under the beach which heat the water providing you with a nice warm bath on the beach.

For the Lord of The Rings/Hobbit fans it was necessary to take a trip over to Hobbiton. Now, personally I like the movies but am by no means a "super fan". They only had to say there was free beer in The Green Dragon pub at the end of the trip and I quickly signed up to visit Casa Del Baggins. Being a man of the people I ended up acquiring not one, not two but three free drinks from the Hobbiton pub a little tipsy. Whilst it was cool to attend you can't actually go into the Hobbit houses and there are so many tourists it kind of ruins the magic of what should be a tranquil environment. Sadly they are trying to squeeze every last penny out of the franchise.

On my actual birthday I had so much goddam fun it's frightening. Firstly they day began at a Waiotapu Geothermal Park. Learning about the Maori relationship with the land and how they used different geothermal baths for different purposes including healing and even for cooking. But it wasnt just a talk, oh no. We were cooked us a boiled in egg in the boiling hot pools which was the perfect breakfast accompaniment. Lastly we were treated to a traditional Maori greeting with suitable tong wagging and screaming. Lastly at the park it  was time to see that native bird of New Zealand, the infamous Kiwi. Now, I had been expecting to see Kiwi birds roaming the woods etc whilst walking. Sadly, the Kiwi is a nocturnal, flightless and endangered bird. However being the birthday boy my wish finally came true and I got to see one in the flesh. They kind of remind me of the Pokémon Doduo but only with one head.

Bungee or bungy (if you're a Kiwi?) Jumping has been on my mind for a very long time and Lake Taupo was the place for it. I can safely say that was one of the best things I have ever done. You may have already seen the video but if not check it out on Instagram. My lovely Canadian buddy Dayna joined me for the bungee swing and and I did a the solo jump also to get the adrenaline pumping.

Having now spent 25 years on this glorious earth I found it strange that I never met somebody with the same birthday as me. Mac Miller is pretty damn close (only a day or so apart) however 2017 is a year of firsts just one, or two, or even three but there was 4 of us celebrating on January 21st. Shout out to Paul, Ben (or Dan) and the other Ben I just met today. Birthday twins are the best people to have around and it makes that special day a little more fun sharing it with others. Multiple G&T's were consumed, dance offs took place and general revelry ensued until the early hours. Finishing with the obligatory late night McDonald's trip for hash bowns and nuggz.

2 days post birthday was arguably the most difficult day of my life to date but also one of immense pride. Hiking the Tongariro crossing is known as one of the best 1 day hikes in NZ and even the world. A 22 KM trek through desert conditions surrounded by nothing but volcanic rock can be quite daunting, but being the tough chap I am that just wasn't enough. Along the walk you have the option to climb the world famous MT Doom from Lord of The Rings. The place Frodo spends three movies trying to reach to destroy the one ring. Coming in over 2000 m above sea level, hiking this bad boy is no mean feat and usually adds about 3 hours onto an already 6 hour hike. In total it took 8 hours and 40 minutes to walk cover 25 km including Doomy Mc Doomface. It was by no means easy and at times I felt that I couldn't do it, you were often climbing a near vertical slope in  volcanic sand  and rubble with two steps forward and half a step back. The views from the top made it all worthwhile. Mike and Elliot my hiking buddy's provided the perfect combination of complaining and support to make it through to the end in one piece.

This weeks diary entry will be finished with pieces of wisdom and general statements from my travels thus far.

- Sulpher baths and geothermal pools fuck up your skin (spots etc)
- Rotorua smells like eggs
- Lasagne pies exist in NZ and they're almost as good as the ones from Wedges on Cold Bath Road, Harrogate, North Yorkshire
- Chocolate bar flavours are on another level in NZ
- You can get a pretty delicious bottle of wine for $7.99 in Pak'n'Save (Gunn estate Sav and Merlot not bad at all)
- Avocados ripen when they want, no matter what you do
- Spiced Rum and orange Fanta isn't FANTAstic (see what I did there)
- Burger Fuel is fantastic (Shout Out PT for the V DUB and satay combo)
- There's more vegans than you think in the world and some of them aren't even that bad
- I can't remember the name of the this shot but, Tequila with lime dipped in coffee on one side and brown sugar on the other side are pretty good
- Deep fried Lasagne and or Mac and cheese slices exist and boy are they good/terrible for you
- NZ's best fish and chips so far has been Oxford Road in Hamilton
- "Everything's just better in Wellington"
-  Andrew Brownlie uses face masks to remain youthful (not travel related but still a fun fact)
- Ginuwine sings that song from Magic Mike (Pony) and it has been stuck in my head for like 3 days
- You don't want to stay in a hot tub for 2 hours after a 25 km hike as your hands could look like mine *see photos*
- Some people are horrible and will steal your beer out of the fridge in a hostel. So to ensure fun times make sure you always have emergency wine stashed
- You can cook an oven pizza in a pan but it may end up as a clazone
-  $14 dollars is a lot to pay for a knock off Guinness

That's all folks,

Peace Up, A-Town Down

The last time I wrote for you wonderful people my heart really wasn't in it. There is far too much to do in this glorious country. The distractions are rife and I've actually got some people to hang out with who aren't moving to the next town or city tomorrow. Surely you noticed the  abrupt ending and lack of enthusiasm. With that in mind a festive hiatus was in order and now I'm back with a bang like an explosive boomerang (If you need a ghost writer Jay Z just holla)

So what does a New Zealand festive hiatus entail you may wonder? Well I've complied a list of all the good shit I've been up to.

There's been more boat rides, catching fish, free diving for scallops, paddle boarding (badly), body boarding, backyard cricket, dolphins, sharks, beer pong, pie face, 80's-noughties kiwi rock bands, wizard staffs, Mo-Town dance parties in the centre of Auckland, Bollywood music videos on top of a volcano, aqua turds, woodland turds, crafty beer, pretentious british man punching way above their weight, fake moustaches, Turkish kebabs, Doing Natasha Bedingfield at karaoke in a gay bar, Blasting Tchaikovsky during a bar lock in at 4 am, Climbing several mountains, Climbing a volcano with great views over Auckland when it was foggy  , Cutting your hand on 3 separate occasions because the twist top beers are a little too tough to open, Drinking a beer that was over 3 years past its expiry date, Multiple games of Articulate, Visiting the 4th largest tree in the world, Consuming the "Best fish and chips in the world" in Manganui sitting over the water in the harbour, Volcano and chill, Making s'mores with Lindt chocolate and those special NZ Christmas cookies, Normal Jenga, Giant Jenga, Jigsaw puzzles, Where's Wally jigsaw puzzles, Frozen sour grape Fanta, Beer funnels and several core classes at the gym.

Whilst I have listed many of the fun things I've been up to NYE was an absolute belter. As mentioned in my last post new year was spent at the Coroglen Tavern. A pub in the middle of nowhere which strangely seems to attract quite good bands from all over. Mi-Sex, Dragon and The Feelers tore the place down. The music was great and I was having so much fun I didn't realise there was an area to buy chips and burgers. Before hand the squad assembled at the campsite for beers, river swimming and general revelry. On the return leg there were approximately 500 people trying to squeeze into a 30 person which didn't suit me at all. Instead I decided a 4km walk in the dark down a country road would be quicker than waiting for the bus and it very nearly was. There ended up being no second run of the bus and myself and Greggsy got 7/8's of the way home before being picked up by our friends who hitched a ride in a mini bus. After this I managed to get myself lost and made friends with an Aussie couple who made me 2 fried egg sandwiches before I finally stumbled back to my tent in the wee hours. All in all its been a successful few weeks.

As some of you may already be aware it's my birthday on January 21st and that means that I'm officially getting on a bit, 25 years old means lots of things, not all of them good.
Firstly, if I was to go on X-Factor (for some strange reason) I'm now in the 25 and older category.
Secondly my 16-25 rail card days are numbered. Soon full price train travel is going to become the norm.
Thirdly, people expect you to have your shit together at 25. Your friends start pooping out babies, getting engaged and I'm over here deciding if 4 cookie dough crunch ice creams for lunch is excessive. However it's not all doom and gloom. It's become apparent from my time away that getting older isn't always a bad thing, after all age is but a number, it's never too late to do what you want and to be honest, partying every night/weekend really isn't that much fun. You start taking less shit too, my patience for people who aren't a positive influence has dwindled and accepting that you won't like everybody nor will everyone like you. Look at me getting all deep and philosophical.

When you're reading this I will be nursing a slight hangover after watching Fat Freddy's Drop sell out a 10,000 capacity gig at a winery to begin my birthday week.

Peace,